Before leaving for a month long trip in south america my family and friends took it upon themselves to warn me of every danger that i would be facing from street riots in Brazil to the bite of a mosquito that could cause malaria so you can imagine bathing was the last thing on my mind. Turns out every single showering experience was a epic adventure and i would love to share these horror stories with you.
So firstly, Obviously, if your accommodation arrangements include 5 star hotels, your bathroom is probably going to be 5 stars as well so this post doesn't really count for those people who will be sipping cocktails by the pool so maybe just move along and enjoy you holiday.
So if you are a student, backpacker, or like us, pilgrims you might find yourself stumbling upon these and i have 3 tips for you to survive the fall if you cant adapt in time.
Tip#1:
Go in with no expectations.
If you have an open mind you're not going to have a panic attack when you're faced with a communal bucket and a facecloth.
Tip#2:
Buy all your toiletries needs over there.
When you try and transport any type of bathroom product from place to place (things like shampoo and conditioner and other liquid products) they are just bulky and take up unnecessary space in your bags. They add weight and unless you plan on washing your hair on the 18 hour plane ride its not necessary and its a pain to get through customs.
My friend 'M' and I bought about 2 liters of shampoo and conditioner once we landed and shared it between us. With our non existent care for personal hygiene it lasted us about 10 days.
Buying liquid products on arrival also eliminates the risk of them exploding in you baggage, as one of us (M) know all to well that when the pressure in the cabin changes and with your suitcase in the ''gentle'' hands and trusted care of the luggage attendants who take there job very seriously in assuring your luggage is handed with care, we had a lovely experience that involved a baby power explosion. Personally I thought the whole thing was hilarious, M did not. I will assure you that after I was done laughing at her, my friendly instincts kicked in and i did help her clean it up.
Buying liquid products on arrival also eliminates the risk of them exploding in you baggage, as one of us (M) know all to well that when the pressure in the cabin changes and with your suitcase in the ''gentle'' hands and trusted care of the luggage attendants who take there job very seriously in assuring your luggage is handed with care, we had a lovely experience that involved a baby power explosion. Personally I thought the whole thing was hilarious, M did not. I will assure you that after I was done laughing at her, my friendly instincts kicked in and i did help her clean it up.
Powder explosion = 5:23
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7eHTDdPWAkE&list=UU_Tzs8SwFj5Twvrt7baujMA
IF you decide to travel with liquid toiletries in your check in bags then please wrap it in 7(000) plastic bags so that if / when it explodes, at least the liquid is contained to the plastic and not your clothes and other belongings.
Tip#3:
Deodorant is your new best friend.
While deteriorate has earned the street name of 'Shower In A Can', I would like to reinstate that it is 110% not!. It does not replace showers, it merely delays them.
Story time...
So on our trip as I said showering wasn't a thought in my mind, we had a total of 5 places to stay and each was very different from the last and out of the 5 places we stayed in we had one proper showering system and this was in Buenos Aries when we first arrived in Argentina. We only stayed in this hotel for 2 nights and had I known it was going to be the only decent 5 star shower I probably would have spent a little more than the rushed 3 mins freshen up before dinner one night that I had mistakenly made.
Bathroom #2
The next 3 nights we spent in a school doing our mission work and as we were sleeping in a classroom on tables (as sleeping on the floor would have risked hypothermia) I should have expected what was coming and that was a communal bucket and a BYO washer.
They filled the basin up with boiling (yes boiling) water and the heat and cleanness of the water maybe lasted about 5 people. There were 30 of us and as I was the 2nd out of our group of 5 the water was about 1000 degrees and I might as well have poured lava all over my body and stared in a Paul Anderson film called Pompeii ... too soon?
They filled the basin up with boiling (yes boiling) water and the heat and cleanness of the water maybe lasted about 5 people. There were 30 of us and as I was the 2nd out of our group of 5 the water was about 1000 degrees and I might as well have poured lava all over my body and stared in a Paul Anderson film called Pompeii ... too soon?
Anyway my justification for the deadly hot water was A) Stop being a baby and B) It's probably going to kill all the germs my washcloth couldn't reach so stop winging about it. There is something very unsettling about standing naked in flip flops and bathing from the bucket, i'm sure the mental imagine is just as unsettling. Anyway once I was finished with my polish bath I deemed myself a true pilgrim. (I even have the shirt to prove it)
Bathroom #3
The farm - This is where o fell in love with the country. We slept in cabins and the showering facilities were defiantly an upgrade to the giant saucepan . The boys had a separate bathrooms to the girls and they were basic showers nothing special. There were 2 showers in each bathroom and due to the time management and the challenge of getting 16 people showered we put the buddy system into place - and before you have an anurisum let me just reassure that the buddy system is not as bad as it seems. Its 100% separate showers with walls and curtains in between them, I just mean 2 people use the bathroom at the same time and while it was risky it was necessary. M and I were used to being shower buddies due to school camps and retreats and stuff so we kind of all ready had a system worked out.
So the only downside to the "sharing is caring'' system was that if both showers were running then it was a gamble as to who would get hot water. You had a 50/50 chance of either luxury or Antarctic dribble.
Now with the buddy system, much like any relationship that you want to work, communication is the key. Talking to each other was absolutely necessary because there was no way either of us was moving without the other knowing about it. I would say that our communication was perfect except the part where we picked out our clothes because we both left wearing the exact same thing. I wish I could say that it was a rare thing... it's not.
Now with the buddy system, much like any relationship that you want to work, communication is the key. Talking to each other was absolutely necessary because there was no way either of us was moving without the other knowing about it. I would say that our communication was perfect except the part where we picked out our clothes because we both left wearing the exact same thing. I wish I could say that it was a rare thing... it's not.
Bathroom #4
This 4th place loured us completely into a false sense of security with it's comfortable beds and hot water, it turned out to be unforgettable. Okay so there is no way to say this without the WTF reaction that it very much deserves so i'll just go ahead and explain...
So there i am, alone, door closed, in the bathroom taking a nice hot shower. I was washing my hair and shaving the small forest that was inhabiting and taking over my legs. Enjoying the heat and final privacy until maybe about 7 mins in when M knocks on the door and sticks her head in. I couldn't think of what she possibly wanted and why it couldn't have waited - what- 5 mins i mean seriously.
I could only just hear her over the water but i could have sworn she said "I don't mean to alarm you..." And then I heard the word ''fire'' and before I could turn the taps off to question her she was gone and for a second I wondered if running out in a towel was necessary but sure enough there was Ben in similar attire to me freaked out trying to explain what had happened to Horacio who was translating it to the manager I guessed.
Now what I am about to say might cause you to scratch your head and trust me I too have pondered on this for many minuets but what had happened was Ben's shower.... caught fire. IT CAUGHT FIRE!? It was someones great idea to heat the water electrical and so when the shower head leaked it shorted on the wires. WHAT!?
Assured of Ben's safety I stormed my way back to the bathroom and huffed as I put clothes on and excepted defeat from the showers this time.
I could only just hear her over the water but i could have sworn she said "I don't mean to alarm you..." And then I heard the word ''fire'' and before I could turn the taps off to question her she was gone and for a second I wondered if running out in a towel was necessary but sure enough there was Ben in similar attire to me freaked out trying to explain what had happened to Horacio who was translating it to the manager I guessed.
Now what I am about to say might cause you to scratch your head and trust me I too have pondered on this for many minuets but what had happened was Ben's shower.... caught fire. IT CAUGHT FIRE!? It was someones great idea to heat the water electrical and so when the shower head leaked it shorted on the wires. WHAT!?
Assured of Ben's safety I stormed my way back to the bathroom and huffed as I put clothes on and excepted defeat from the showers this time.
Bathroom #5
Rio De Janerio. 11 Days. 35 Degrees. 4 Girls. 1 Bathroom. Yep.
So the thing about this hotel was that the weird design of the building included a void space directly in the middle of the building. For some ingenious engineering someone decided to put all the bathrooms backing onto the void space and so all the bathroom windows. It was basically just a big vertical hallway of echos. At one point I was in the bathroom and Shannon, downstairs was singing in the shower and I was able to shout out to her and maintain a conversation through the hall way.
It was good fun then but not so much fun when people started finishing work at 1 am and decided to have a good old chat which included everyone in the hotel.
The WORST part about this hotel and the echoing hallways was that Shannon singing and pointless conversations between workers weren't the only thing we could here.... yep .... it got weird.
I don't know who they were perhaps a couple on a honey moon but there little escapade forced an unexpected trip to the beach for M and I who couldn't sit around and listen to that kind of hanky panky. Running out of the hotel one of our group members stopped us to ask where we were going. a little bit scared neither of us could give a straight answer so we just said 'Out of our room.' and bailed, never speaking of the indecent again.
So after all these challenging, personality growing, story telling adventures, all I could repeat to myself is "i'm not a tourist i'm a pilgrim'' and imagine the hours I would spend in the shower when I got home to Australia.
In he end it was the best experience ever and I had the most amazing time and lets be honest these stories are so fun to tell and I wouldn't have wanted it any different. (Except maybe a shower that didn't spontaneously burst into flames.)
Kelsey Marcella
